I am a born blether!! However, I need to add the disclaimer that I don't always blether on about nothing!!
I love nothing more than being involved in great conversation, fabulous stories and belly laughing humour. I'm sure part of that enjoyment is cultural - being Scottish we all love a good blether, but the other part is simply that I thoroughly enjoy connecting with people. It's a wonderful thing expanding your own life experience by getting to know others and listening to their life stories.
I believe I also have the 'gift of the written gab.' Somehow what I write seems to connect with those who choose to read my creative compositions.
It took me a long time to pluck up the courage to write for the public to read. While I had a deep desire to write from my soul, there was also the fear of judgement, fear that my material might be used against me, or that I was not as accomplished a writer as I thought I might be. I also questioned who would be interested in reading what I have to say - after all, who am I?? In the end I put all those unfounded fears aside and trusted that my intention to write was coming from a pure place.
After a period of deliberation and a lot of encouragement from people in my life, I got brave! I started to write here on Karen-Ology and then created my personally risky blog - A Compulsive Story. The sole purpose for writing about food addiction in the blog domain was in order to help any fellow human being who may be going through the same and the purpose of Karen-Ology is for me to put down in words my thoughts, my opinions, my loves, my joys and to let you get to know the essence of me!
Maya Angelou said "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."
I believe we all have a story to tell. Having stories inside that are expressed in the written word, creates a soul connection with the reader akin to listening to a moving piece of music, watching an amazing dance routine or viewing an astounding painting. All soul filling connections.
The art of writing is as powerful an art form as any of The Arts. I know I am reading a great book when I am in that story, living each page, seeing, hearing, smelling and feeling the author's pictures painted by words.
While I am no literary scholar, or even an accomplished writer, I do love to paint pictures with my words; imparting good vibes, an avenue of helpful connection or merely an opinion. Hopefully, I also manage to communicate a little bit of Karen-Ology blethering with you at the same time.
There comes a time in our lives when we have to get real. A time when we have to look ourselves in the eye and be drop dead honest about our good and bad points.
I used to be the kind of person that was terrified of being perceived as bad/not nice/wrong. For an intelligent lady, it took me a fair while to understand that being perfect and doing everything right was virtually impossible; in fact striving for it was utterly exhausting.
Nobody in this world is perfect, nobody has carte blanche on doing things right every single time and I now understand that part of the whole human experience is owning our darker side, embracing instead of rejecting our shadow.
For a long time I rejected my shadow, hid it from all and sundry due to fear of rejection, judgement or losing friends. In doing so I was in effect cutting myself off from a rich supply of information about how I tick. While this 'darkness' holds my unspoken fears, anger, judgements etc. it is very much part of who I am; for me to be a whole, truly happy human being, acceptance of the light as well as the dark side of me is extremely important.
I am not for one minute suggesting that every time I make a mistake, or my shadow appears, I harshly criticise, judge, or beat myself up. However, what I do endeavour to do is learn from my negative actions and reactions, to see where I can grow and live in a more conscious way. It is not comfortable to look at my shadow, but it is courageous and I am very grateful for every opportunity I have to become a better person today than I was yesterday.
Carl Jung in his collected works says: "Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual's conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. If an inferiority is conscious, one always has a chance to correct it...but if it is repressed and isolated from consciousness, it never gets corrected."
Today, me and my shadow get along just fine! I actually do embrace that side of Karen. I can laugh at some of my negative reactions, I know how to look for triggers to those moments that create a challenge in my life. Having learned how to handle that darker side of me has created a wholly positive outcome; a happier existence, self love, self acceptance and self respect.
Get to know your shadow, embrace it, learn from it and be the amazing 'yin and yang' creation you are.
